Jed Elliott

hey jed. and jeds. it's jed. i like what you've got going on here.
i want in.
what would i need to do to convince you i'm worthy of my own Jedsite?
Well, i've been a jed my whole life. My parents couldn't decide between Jared and Jedediah, so they put Jared on the birth certificate and called me Jed. The only person who ever calls me Jared is my mom, and she only does that when i've done something wrong.
actually, come to think of it is there a I tend to screw up quite a bit.
oh. yeah, i just checked. there is, but it's nowhere near as cool as this one. it's all about jewelry. lame.
also, if you let me in to this exclusive club, then you'll have 515 jeds.
i know.
i'll say it again.
515 Jeds.
In summation, my application for nomination to this enumeration finds its best explanation in the imagination of a Jed.
Well, not a jed, but a ted, instead.
Theodore Seuss Geisel wrote a book entitled "The 500 hats of bartholemew cubbins".
He also wrote "The Sleep Book", in which he makes the argument
"the bed of a Jedd / Is the softest / Of beds in the world / It is said."
I'll be honest. I've totally lost my train of thought. I think i was going somewhere with that, like my bed is soft, and 500... something, somethings  or something along those lines. but, ah... yeah. it's gone now.
So do i win?
 spantifulous regards,
jed elliott